Yay! I survived Thanksgiving! In all seriousness, it was actually nice to not be at home. Though, the drive was some bullshit. Now, I'm just trying to get back in my regular groove.
I made the choice to cancel my health insurance about a month ago. It was already close to the end of the year, it was stupidly expensive for nothing, and I had an alternative to getting my psych meds - easy peasy.
Oooh. That sounds interesting "psych meds". I'm not *that* crazy though. Just your every day(ish) type crazy.
Anywho. Fast forward. I have not yet been able to get to said alternative. I have run out of three of the four meds that I typically take. One of them has been gone for a while because it's so expensive, so really it's just two I guess. One of them I took every night to help me sleep. My insomnia is directly linked to my anxiety. Brain won't turn off = no sleeps. Out of that one. I figured, no big deal - I can just take my benadryl, and pass the fuck out.
Except no, no - that's not actually how that will work! Instead, I take my benadryl and my anxiety manages to completely override it. To the point that for two nights now, I've been up at 2 or 3 am. Wide awake. WIDE. AWAKE. widemotherfuckingawake.
Have I ever mentioned that I am the type of person who needs to get her full nights sleep? Or else I become quite the bitchy bitch? No? Well, there you go.
So here I am. Thursday. I've had maybe 8 hours of sleep in the last 48. There are still five more hours to get through for the work day, then I have an hour drive home to survive. I'm supposed to have class tonight. When I get home - if I have that feeling, the one you get when you know you're going to be up no matter what you do - I'll get ready and go. If I get home, and think I can actually manage to sleep - well, for my safety and yours, that will be happening.
I am also irritated that it is turning into quite the goddamned ordeal to get my medication at all. I mean, I'm not taking any fucking narcotics - nothing that is seriously "controlled" - so there shouldn't be an issue. Thanks pharmaceutical companies - I hope your CEO's all get sand fleas in their underwear, two flat tires, and a difficult to diagnose rash. Assholes.
No comments:
Post a Comment