I have added quite a few of my Krav class mates to my FB page - because I like them. They are funny, they are good people, they kick my butt twice a week and watch me sometimes flop like a fish.. but still root for me. They seem to not give a shit that I cuss like a sailor (or they're politely ignoring it - either way, go you!).
Right. So. We have SuperBeast (that's a compliment by the way, and yes, it's a she - and I don't care who you are, she can take you) and Mr. SuperBeast, then we have Minnie (Minnie the Moocher song always plays in my head for this lady) and her daughter Hedy (yeah, as in Lamar, because she's pretty and she's good at science IT'S THE WAY MY BRAIN WORKS!), Sgt. McGoof and his progeny - There are three, so they will be Larry, Curly and Baby Moe, Twin (we share the same name - though he is male), The Professor, Mama Bear, Mini-Instructor and Sailor Moon. There are a couple others, but these are the peeps I've been in class with the most recently.
I knew when I started this thing there would be testing. I mean, my brain received that information blinked at it, and then filed it under "Ignoreuntilnecessaryinordertopreventimplosion". I love my brain.
Well. It's coming. And I've been doing awesome - Tabata sets at work, walking, etc. I already drink water all day. I'm a little nervous, a little scared - mostly ignoring it. Until I have a moment of "OMGWTFHAVEIDONETOMYSELF?!?!" To which there is generally no reply (yes, I talk to myself - shut it!) or, if I'm freaking out all over someone (either the BFF or my Person) then I get encouraging responses. BFF: "You'll be fine." My Person: "I believe in you. Harness your inner Wonder Woman, go forth and conquer."
Alrighty. As we can see from Exhibits A and B - *I* am apparently awesome. So I have nothing to worry about. Right? Right?!?!?!
Then today, I get a lovely message from Twin. It really was lovely - very encouraging and uplifting, with some advice about how to approach the next two weeks. You're probably used to reading most of my blog in Snark Voice. Really - no snark here. It was awesome. Thank you. Words like "cardio, watch what you're eating, beast mode, one day, come back for second test so we can beat you up".
Okie doke. Hours later: (This is how my brain works) As we can see from Exhibit C - *I* am apparently not nearly as awesome as I thought I was and I'm going to die while doing my own test, and then I'm going to die again while the advanced people do their test, and I can only eat lettuce (never fucking kale!) for the rest of my life because Twin said that I had to do all of these things because everything happens in beast mode and if I don't do it then I'm going to fail and nobody likes a goddamned loser Dani. *gaspgaspgaspflailgaspflail*
Am finally calm. Ish. Calmish. I think there will be hiking this weekend at Red Top. To keep my brain from gaspflailing anymore. Twin? I hate you. But just a smidge. I mean - it *is* pretty funny.
*** https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_types_of_killing *** Just for future reference.
P.S.
I promise to not eat pizza before the test.
******************EDIT*****************
For some reason Twin thought I was discouraged. This is not the case. This is just my normal every day brain cycle - and it's conclusion makes me (and hopefully some other folks) laugh. So no, Twin was not being mean to me. ;)
No comments:
Post a Comment