*waves* Hiya. Yeah, it's been another couple of months. I'm not entirely certain that blogging once every couple of months is helpful at all - but what the hell, right? Certainly can't hurt.
I'm still trying to transition more away from FB. It's hard. I've not done a good job of it. So there you go - one small failure, documented.
Oi vay. Yeah, I know - but hey, let's go ahead and set the tone right for this shite! It's MAY!
That's right. May. My birthday is tomorrow. May 4th. May the 4th be with you. You'll never forget it - Star Wars Day, etc. I have always been a birthday person. I have enjoyed celebrating my own, and other people's. I mean - birthday weeks, cards, gifts, cake - what's not to like?
Except May also has mom's birthday. And mother's day. And my friend Ian's birthday (and he just died). So. Yeah. May. I want to enjoy you. I want to be able to be as silly as I used to be, and have ridiculous shenanigans and smiles and laughter and it's my birthday nonsense.
I just can't. I'm trying. I actually made a plan to go out for my birthday, invited damn near every person I know. I have considered canceling the whole thing since then. I'm not going to. I figure if I need to leave, I will.
I keep thinking this is the hour/day/week/month/year that I can be like, "Oh hey, I'm good now!" in regards to ninja grief. Every damn time, I'm wrong though.
So hey - sorry I'm weird this month. But.. reasons. I'm trying. And it's fucking hard. Hopefully, I'll see a few of you tomorrow, and we can be silly and happy and all that jazz.
In the mean time, I'm going to GO to class tonight (I was going to bail) and work hard enough that there's no room for that bullshit in my brain. Here's hoping it works! ;)
***Turns out I wasn't done.
I miss talking to mom after I got out of work. I'm a huge nerd - I love to research things. I'll find something that I don't know a lot about, or just something I'm fascinated with - and then dive in. Even when I'm busy at work, I find something new to discover. Then I would go home and tell mom. Granted - she was a captive audience haha, since she was bed bound - but trust me, she could still let you know if you were getting on her damn nerves. She ALWAYS paid attention, because what I had to say mattered - even if the topic at hand wasn't something she cared about. If she really didn't like it - or thought it was dumb, I'd get an epic eye roll and a chuckle. She still listened. I stopped gathering info to share like that. I think I'll start that back up, and harass other random people with it.
